Pray That We Make It to 21.
Today marks the day that my baby sister would have been 21 years old. I imagine she'd be off in some major city on a summer internship, preparing to head into her senior year at Harvard—a "choice" she made against her will, making up for what my uncle would go on to call the "dumbest decision I ever made." She'd likely be better with numbers than I. She'd be innately smart in ways that I could only obtain through hard work. Aside from book smarts, she'd likely be effortlessly cool in ways that younger siblings often are. While I'd teach her everything she needed to know about navigating life, she'd probably be far better at men. She'd have explored the off-beaten path while I was busy being self-paralyzing in an attempt to please my mother. She'd always jump in ways that I never thought of and find herself in some shit. Because she would know I'd always rescue her.
Fortunately enough I've been blessed with more opportunities to be a sister, both biologically and to spirits I've accumulated along the way. I've been reflecting a ton lately on sustaining friendships, and how to hold myself accountable for being better for myself and others. I compiled a list of 21 things I can work on now to be a better sister.
1. Do more. Stop being complacent and leaving things up to chance. Pull up if you have to. Let people pull up on me, even though I hate that shit.
2. Be financially supportive in the ways I would have liked to have been financially supported in college.
3. Be a more involved aunt, to ALL my nieces and nephews.
4. Help Ant & D find summer internships outside of home (and continue to get on their damn nerves when they're not listening).
5. Facilitate Talenti & wine pop ups for Alex & Ambs.
6. Lend an ear, even when I don't feel like it or I'm tired.
7. Make it a point to make sure I schedule time to call everyone. Distribute my energy as evenly as possible.
8. Hug Bria and make her teach me every recipe she knows every chance I get.
9. Meet Deanna in whatever city she's in.
10. Go visit Riz and her new home.
11. Make it to New Heights more with Talia.
12. Rebuild my relationship with Taurean.
13. Start the relationship with Kambre that our parents would never let us have.
14. Get Mikayla and Patty on an island.
15. Be an example for E'lese and Jasmin and Melody and Skye and every other little girl counting on me.
16. Provide joy (and random trips like New Orleans) whenever that "season" hits for my Harlem sisters.
17. Spend more time with Kiema and Rif (this is probably more for me than it is for them).
18. Check in on Dom and Naia more.
19. Keekee with Destinee and Maiah more. Must involve lots of food and lots of wine.
20. Be more open to accepting and investing in more people.
21. Take care of myself so that I can be a better person to those around me.